Living life to the fullest after a dementia diagnosis can be difficult. As the disease progresses, it can be unnerving to take your loved one out of the environment they are most comfortable in (home). But, the benefits of keeping your loved one socially engaged may just help them remain independent longer.
Denise Park, a psychologist and director of the Productive Aging Laboratory at the Center for Brain Health at the University of Texas, Dallas, believes that social interaction, like mental exercises and learning, may limit the amount of time that the aging brain can remain unfocused, in a daydream-like state. Her theory is that older people have more difficulty switching between daydreaming and focused attention to important details. So the more time the aging brain spends mentally stimulated and socially engaged, the less switching is necessary, and the easier it is to perform the daily tasks necessary for independent living.
If you dread the thought of taking your loved one out in public, you’re not alone. In a recent survey, 74 percent of surveyed family caregivers caring for an individual with a dementia illness said they and their loved ones had become more isolated as a result of the disease. Caregivers said the unpredictable behavior that can accompany dementia made the idea of going out in public stressful.
It’s important for you to spend time with your loved one outside of their new home. Whether it’s going to a baseball game, out to eat or visiting the local beach, there are many different ways to spend time together. Here are five ways you can make outings less stressful and more enjoyable for both you and your loved one with dementia.
1. Plan an Activity They Once Enjoyed
A change in ability as dementia or Alzheimer’s advances doesn’t have to mean giving up the activities they once enjoyed doing. Many activities can be modified or adapted to your loved one’s capabilities. Maybe they used to enjoy golfing, but it’s too difficult for them to play all 18 holes. Find a simpler version like going mini golfing or to a golf range that still gives them an opportunity to hit a golf ball. Make it a realistic activity where they will succeed and feel like they accomplished something.
2. Avoid Conflict
A change of environment can cause anxiety or stress and can cause your loved one to act differently than they otherwise would at home. Be patient and keep your attention on them. If the long line at the restaurant is causing your loved one to pace, consider going to a different restaurant. If what your loved one’s order becomes suddenly unappealing to them, grab a to-go box and try eating again later. Avoiding conflict is key when taking your loved one on an outing.
3. Ask for Special Accommodations
Call the company or activity location you’re taking your loved one with dementia to and explain your situation. Give them a heads up that you’ll need a special accommodation. If you’re going out to lunch at a restaurant nearby, talk with the server about your party needing extra time when ordering and a quieter part of the resultant to sit in. It can make all the difference in keeping your loved one relaxed and safe in a new environment.
4. Plan to Take Rest Breaks
Incorporate some downtime during your outing. Being in a different environment with new sights and sounds can cause your loved one to have an increase of agitation. Build in rest breaks throughout the day to help them feel more rested and charged to stay involved with the activity. Have snacks and water packed to keep your loved one hydrated.
5. Be Flexible and Patient
If your loved one with dementia insists they don’t want to participate in the activity, it might be because they’re afraid to try it. If you find your parent suddenly unbuttoning their blouse, it may indicate they're too warm. Watch for cues from your loved one and be flexible about your plans. Have a backup plan. If you had planned a visit to the zoo, but they refuse to get out of the car because they “don’t want to see the animals,” give them an alternative such as going to the movies instead.
Spending time with your loved one with dementia doesn’t have to be complicated and frustrating. When you plan ahead of time by keeping in mind their interests, their capability of participating in the activity, and how they might react to these situations will set you both up for a successful day. Your loved one with dementia can still enjoy going out to participate in activities with you, they may just need a few modifications.
Scientists are only beginning to understand the full effect of remaining socially engaged after a dementia diagnosis. One thing is for certain, social isolation prevents your loved one from having meaningful interactions and conversations with others that keeps the brain stimulated.
Learn more about caring for someone with dementia by downloading our eBook.
